It takes time to become intimate with another person! The same is true of your relationship with the Lord.

For those of you who are married... When you first met your spouse, did you know everything there was to know about them and decide that you would marry then before you even saw them? Of course not! Your relationship developed over time. You walked together and talked together and laughed together. You held hands. And sometimes you probably just sat together staring at each other and enjoying the love you felt for each other. Perhaps you watched a sunset. Perhaps you lay on the grass and watched the clouds pass by overhead. One thing is certain: You learned to enjoy each other’s company, you build up trust, and you began to run to each other in times of trouble.

Intimacy with God is no different! Getting to know God begins with being still in his presence, and looking him in the face.

Daniel 11:32 b (KJV) says, “but the people that do know their God shall be strong, and do exploits.”

Intimacy does not occur when one person does all the talking. Intercession then should not begin with a talk (or asking) session. Intimacy begins when we learn to enjoy the Lord’s company. So let’s learn the joy of finding our Secret place – of finding Jesus within the Secret Place – before we go on. Remember that Jesus often whispers before he shouts. The goal of this step, then, isn't to approach God about the needs of others, but simple to be with him.

I remember when he first brought me to this step. I had been in the habit of barging into the Secret Place with my list of needs. I barely even said ‘hi’ before I began. I felt him patiently listen to each and every need, but then I sensed his disquiet. I was concerned, so I asked him what was wrong. I heard in my heart: "Do you always barge into a conversation (even when there is no emergency) without seeing if your friend is talking to someone else first? Why then do you not extend the same courtesy to me?"

My jaw hung open! I had never considered that perhaps I should just come into our Secret Place and say nothing at all; that I should just wait to see what he was doing before I jumped in with my prayer requests.

So began my time of learning to be still, and knowing my God!

Baby Steps

Don't be hard on yourself. Take baby steps first. It takes time to learn to run with the horses of war. If you train to run a marathon, you may only be able to run for five minutes at first. Over the course of a few months, you can run for miles. Give yourself time to grow.

One Step at a Time

Please don’t rush ahead! Learn this step, and learn it well, before you progress. Do each step for at least three minutes, using a three-minute egg timer.

Step 1. Let go of your worries

Release your desire to hurry. Let go of your “to do” lists, your anxiety about tomorrow.

Step 2. Present yourself

Surrender to the Lord with empty hands and a prepared mind for use in prayer. Surrender yourself as a living sacrifice to God, holy and acceptable to him (Romans 12:1). Lie down on the floor if it helps. Completely surrender to him.

Step 3. Wait!

Just wait. Be still. Quiet your mind. Don't speak or think words. This is a time for silence – to listen to the heart of God. Listen for his heartbeat. He promises in Proverbs 8:17: “I love those who love me; and those who seek me find me.” So wait until he joins you.

I have found in my own walk that this step prevents religiosity. See what his day has been like. Then talk about your requests. Now don't become so bogged down with legalism that you can’t ever see him without stillness, because in an emergency there is room to barge in (Hebrews 4:16). But in this verse there is a clarifier: “There to receive help in time of trouble.”

Step 4. Recognize

…that this may take practice!

I remember that this step took me four months, 30 minutes at a time, in order to sit still for just three minutes. You may have an easier time of it; but those who know me know that I am a ball of energy that is constantly on the move! So I had a real hard time of it.

Step 5. Remember that God is waiting for you!

I believe that God is more concerned with this step than any other.

His interest since the beginning of time was fellowship with man! It was his motive for all of creation. He paid a high price for it in his only Son!

If you allow it to, this step can:

Open the very gates of heaven.

Renew your strength.

Give you the ability to rise above adversity.

Allow you to run with the horses of war without growing weary.

Enable you to walk with the Lord without fainting.

“but those who hope in the Lord
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint” (Isaiah 40:31).

So How do we Learn to be Still?

Set up an earthly sanctuary for your beloved.

Turn off your phone. Place a note on your prayer room door. Tell your loved ones how much this time means to you.

Make it a date with the lover of your soul. Guard it! If you have a spouse who's praying, guard their time with him as well, by watching the kids and helping out with obligations.

Make your earthly spot a peaceful, beautiful and relaxing place to go. Bring paper and pens, your Bible, songbooks, and even your favorite coffee cup.

I have a blanket that I spread out on the floor wherever I am. Here it is!

It’s old, worn and has the telltale marks of worth. It’s been saturated with my tears and has witnessed laughter and joy that I never believed I could feel. Feel free to touch it, feel it. It’s walked with me a long way into my special Secret Place. It is now very precious to me. Just one look at it and I can not help but smile and remember the presence of God.

Fix your eyes on Jesus.

Behold his beauty!  Like the angels and all God's creatures, present yourself to God in stillness. Imagine yourself at his throne, lying at his feet.

Take a few deep breaths.

At first, you may need to take a few deep breaths. Slow your breathing. Hold it for a few seconds. It's amazing how fast your mind will quiet down when your body quiets down. Taking a few deep breaths will quiet down the body automatically.

Just focus on the Lord, and listen for his small, still voice.